As we are heading into the summer, I can’t help but look back at this year. It would be cheesy to say that I have changed a lot, but truth is, I have.

The first time I came to Santiago was in 8th grade on the annual class trip. We walked in through the front gate and through the quad. I had absolutely no idea what was going on. To say the least, it was a very surreal moment.

My first day at Santiago was also very strange. I took too long getting to my first period, so I was the last one in, resulting in everyone staring at the girl that was late. Several classes later, the day was over and I was already dreading the next morning. A big portion of my year was telling myself ‘only an hour left’ or ‘you just have to make it through one more period’. It made me feel like I had something to look forward to, instead of just another day of the same thing.

I think it never really settled in that I was in high school until now. As a kid, you see movies of exaggerated high school scenarios and characters. Whether you realize it or not, that is what you expect because it has been programmed into you. In middle school, every one is a big fish in a small pond, but in high school, you aren’t even a small fish in an ocean. You are the carbon that bubbles from the bottom of the sea trying to reach the world above the water.

Now, I don’t tell myself that there is only an hour left. Now I tell myself that I wish there was another hour left, because this is the only today I have and I shouldn’t look forward to the end of it only to realize that I have to do the same thing over again.

I understand when people say your high school years are short now, because it feels like yesterday I was trying to figure out what shoes to wear to the Homecoming dance. It feels like yesterday when I lost my locker combination and couldn’t get my language arts textbook until a week later, which was when I realized that it was in the back of my binder. It feels like yesterday I was at my 8th grade promotion looking for the guy I liked, only I realized he hadn’t even bothered to show up.

Now it seems I don’t care if I’m alone or if my shoes aren’t perfect or if I’m not perfect. Being in high school did that for me.