Age Gap in a Relationship: Is it Wrong?


Me and my girlfriend at 2021 Homecoming.

Mikaile Ford (Kai), Staff Writer

As a high schooler, I’ve overheard many conversations ranging from whether or not PDA is appropriate to couples’ age difference being a problem, but is it so wrong to date someone two or three years younger or older than you? Most people would say it’s wrong because of the stereotypical creepy senior boys chasing the innocent freshmen girls, but people forget that not all age gap relationships are like this. One very good example of this is my own relationship. I am a 17-year-old senior and when I tell people my girlfriend is a 15-year-old sophomore, they look shocked or disgusted, but I didn’t date my girlfriend because of her age. We formed a connection and were attracted to each other’s personalities and looks. By not letting an age gap determine whether or not we were good for each other, we continue to thrive in our relationship. In some cases, like mine, the younger partner is super mature for their age. My girlfriend acts like a second mother to me and she handles situations in a different way than someone her age would. My twin is a 17-year-old senior as well, dating a 16-year-old junior. Most people won’t see a problem with this because they are only a year apart, but it shouldn’t matter what other people think of someone else’s relationship. Everyone has certain expectations for other people’s relationships when they can’t seem to maintain their own. Relationships work differently for everyone. Some age gap relationships work and others don’t, but it shouldn’t be judged by other people on whether or not it’s wrong because it works for them. 

My sister and her girlfriend

My girlfriend and I have been dating for over four months now and I wouldn’t change a thing about our relationship, but I continue to hear how gross it is that I’m dating a sophomore and that we won’t last when I’m in college, but honestly, my girlfriend is much more mature than any of the girls my age. I didn’t look for a specific age or type of look in the person I chose to love. I love her because of who she is as a person and how she helps me grow as a person, as do most relationships. Just because there’s a slight age gap, it doesn’t make us any different than any other relationship in our own ages. I found it refreshing to date her because the age difference gives a different perspective on life and she can look up to me for college application and essay help or any advice for the future in general.

Me and my girlfriend at Knott’s Scary Farm

People know not to judge people by their stereotypes because of how it may affect those types of people. Not all Black people are gangsters, not all Mexican people are illegal immigrants, not all Asians look the same, etc. Age gap relationships stereotypically have been wrong because of the examples that seniors have put forward in the past when messing with freshman or sophomore girls, otherwise spoiling the thought of a senior-sophomore relationship, but the relationships that are formed out of love, are ignored by the gap in their relationship and driven apart by other people’s opposing views. Who I love, age, race, religion, etc. shouldn’t matter so much to someone who isn’t dating that person I love because I chose to love that person for my reasons and those feelings aren’t going to change because there’s a gap in our age.

My goal at the end of this article is to keep my readers thoughtful and open-minded when it comes to these relationships. It is normal to have your own opinions about how someone’s relationship should look, but don’t let your own beliefs affect their relationship.